This interview feels like it's been ten years in the making. In all the time I've watched (and mostly loved) Jon Stewart's work on The Daily Show, I've had two complaints: 1.) His knee-jerk need to pay lip service to "both sides are the same" bullshit memes and, 2.) His habit of going soft on his right-wing guests.
We saw the latter most recently when Jon had torture-memo author John Yoo on the show. It was a travesty. Stewart let himself get bamboozled by this shameful hack, failing to press hard points, allowing bogus assertions to go unchallenged, and ultimately letting one of the true villains of the Bush Administration walk off the set with a smile and a skip in his step.
Well, not this time. No sir. It appears Jon finally learned his lesson.
Thiessen was on to promote his "book" - scare quotes artfully deployed here to suggest that it's a childish stack of crayon scribblings by a man with no moral compass - Courting Disaster: How the CIA Kept America Safe and How Barack Obama Is Inviting the Next Attack. The conversation, however, quickly sidetracked into Liz Cheney's despicable smear campaign against the "Al Qaeda 7", aka the lawyers who did their duty by defending a handful of Gitmo detainees. I'm going to guess that, for whatever reason, this issue was the straw that broke Jon Stewart's spleen. I'm going to guess it hit a hell of a nerve. Because Jon does not hold back. He does not let Thiessen's lies and hypocrisy go unchallenged. He does not let Thiessen slip away with lame jokes or awkward segues into the next topic. [trigger warning] No, he fucks Thiessen. He bends him right over that desk and fucks the shit out of him. He exposes that piece of filth for the empty shell he is and leaves him sputtering and furious and frustrated as they cut to the final commercial. And gods was it a godsdamned glorious sight. I felt like I needed a cigarette afterwards.
I hope this isn't a one-off. Despite his demurrals about "basic cable", Jon Stewart has a pretty sizeable megaphone. If he's finally woken up and decided to unabashedly use his powers for good, it could make a difference.
Tags: Jon Stewart, lying scumbag Marc Thiessen
I got an email from Howard Dean today vowing to fight for the Public Option and ending with a demand for Democrats to "Get on board or get out of the way." I find that exhortation ironic.
Speaking of Howard Dean, Jon Chait's look back at the 2004 Dem presidential field is not flattering. In retrospect, Kerry really may have been the best of the bunch.
Dennis Kucinich was, of course, in that field. And with regard to Special K, What Furious Said.
My advice to Jim Calhoun? If you get an invite to the NIT, politely decline. The Huskies don't belong in any postseason tournament, even that Loserfest. Go with your team into the wilderness and contemplate the depth of your shame.
Aside from his resignation's impact on the vote threshold necessary to get HCR through the House, I really don't give a fuck about the Eric Massa saga.
I love when people say they "don't agree" with homosexuality. Last I checked, no one was asking you to agree or disagree.
Steny, baby: If this is the Democrats' idea of "as soon as possible" then you might want to look up the meaning of the words "soon" and "possible".
This is the funniest XKCD I've seen in a while.
Rock on, Big Labor. Somebody needs to tell Dems that if they block HCR they're going to get knee-capped in November. It ain't pretty, but the time for tolerating the cowards and dainty purists is done.
And last but decidedly not least, we're celebrating Tracy's Birthweek in the Toast Household. Not familiar with the whole "Birthweek" concept? I'm sure she'd be happy to enlighten you.
Tags: Howard Dean, 2004 election, Dennis Kucinich, UConn Huskies, things I don't care about, homophobic assholes, Democrats in dead heat with molasses, Sauron, self aware FAIL, Labor bullies Dems
Oscar night! The Superbowl of the awards show season is here. We will be tuning in to CNN's Showbiz Tonight at 7:00 PM to watch their red carpet coverage. Apparently that's the only game in town this year, unless you want to watch Oscar.com's Facebook webcast which - me being me - I most certainly do not.
We've only seen two of the ten Best Picture nominees - Avatar and District 9 - so, as usual for us, this will be more of a three-hour advertisement for the past year's best movies than anything else - an opportunity to pad our Netflix queueueue, and a chance to ogle the celebritati. I will be pulling for Avatar, however. Not only was it my favorite movie in many years, but I'm sick and tired of critics and fellow movie-goers pooh-poohing it. Formulaic plot be damned, Cameron's ten-year project was an exercise in sheer awesomeness.
If you're tuning in for the Big Shew, please join us in comments to share your witty observations and help us pass the evening more sociably.
Tags: Oscars
Well I'll be damned. Harry Reid threatened to force Bunning to actually filibuster instead of just letting him threaten a filibuster and giving him his way. And they said it couldn't be done! (No, really, we were told many times, for what were obviously flimsy, self-serving reasons, that it literally couldn't be done.)
So, everyone still betting on healthcare reform not passing? Because if Obama, Reid, and Pelosi are just going through the motions to "tease" the base, they're sure as hell doing a convincing job of it.
Heh. You can't say that the RNC doesn't understand the people they suck money from.
Tags: filibuster, healthcare reform, Republican donors
Poor, sad little wingers. They keep running shit up the flagpole but reality steadfastly refuses to salute. (Of course, Glenn Beck will cite this as evidence that ACORN controls the court system.)
Tags: ACORN, James+O'KeefeJames O’Keefe
Wow. It's been a while since I've gone over a week without posting (aside from vacation breaks, of course). To what do I ascribe this apathy? I dunno. The world of politics feels like it's ground to a halt. The world of mainstream sports has taken a back seat to the Olympics, and while I enjoy The Games immeasurably -- seriously, ask Tracy; I imagine she can't wait for the closing ceremonies tonight; I've promised her days of HGTV when this is over -- I don't have a lot to say about them. Except Night Train rocks and curling is far more interesting than I imagined and Lindsey Vonn is a great skier but she sure seems to crash and get injured a lot. And other than that? Well, Crackbook is hurting my output as well. Hell of a lot easier to one-click-share an article, write a one-sentence blurb, and be done with it. And as long as I'm there doing that, check Mafia Wars, Farmville, and maybe play some Desktop Defender. I think there's a map or two left that I don't have the high score on.
But I digress, and that's the problem, isn't it? So bear with me as I bang the rust off this old toaster, plug it in, hope it doesn't short out or catch on fire, and try to crisp up a few Slices of Toast
Yesterday was tax day in the Toast household, and it did not go well. I have to say, every time I fire up TurboTax it frays my nerves. We usually get a nice refund - a couple of grand on average - but the frequent tax trauma I experienced in a past life, when my ex's multiple jobs would screw up our withholding and we'd end up owing thousands of dollars which we didn't have, left me scarred and jittery when I approach filing time, always worried that something is going to go terribly wrong.
This year, my fears turned out to be justified. Something did indeed go terribly wrong.
Remember the tax breaks that went into the Stimulus bill? The "Making Work Pay" tax credit? Well, interesting thing about that. As you probably remember, in order to get that money into the economy, the shapers of the bill instructed the IRS to modify their withholding rules so that the extra money would dribble into workers' paychecks a bit at a time. Unlike a rebate or a bigger refund, this approach would quietly goose the economy as regular peeps unknowingly spent just a little extra because, well, it was there.
Good theory. Good policy. Only one problem: For certain people -- let's say, just to pick a random fucking hypothetical, married couples with two incomes -- these changes, the IRS warned, could result in a smaller refund. How much smaller? Well, in our case, our employers withheld about $1800 less than they did in 2008. And since we earned a few thousand more in 2009 our tax liability went up a bit. Add it up and, hey, holy FUCK, Turbo Tax says were getting back... thirty seven dollars! Not two thousand and thirty seven dollars! Thirty seven dollars! But hey, that's OK because it's not like we already kinda spent that money or anything.
Look, you all know I'm not one to complain about taxes. You want to bump our taxes up to pay for healthcare reform or a green energy Manhattan project or just to repair potholes? Fine, knock yourself out. But don't screw me on withholding. Don't quietly change the damned rules without giving me a heads up so that I get gobsmacked come filing time. If you jack up our taxes, withhold more to compensate. And if you're going to withhold almost two grand less than you did last year, make sure I owe two grand less in taxes. Idiots.
This is sad. I understand why they're doing it. Shonn Greene is younger, faster, stronger, and demonstrated down the stretch that he can carry the workload of a feature back. Also, it looks like Leon Washington should be all the way back in time for the start of the season, ready to resume his role as explosive, unpredictable, uncontainable playmaker. But still, this is sad. Thomas Jones was a warrior for the Jets through good times (this year) and bad (the previous two years). He was the heart of our offense, compensating for the shortcomings of a rookie QB ('09), an aging prima donna ('08) and the injury-riddled clusterfuck by committee that the Jets featured in '07. It's a shame to see him go.
Update: The Daily News' Rich Cimini convincingly condemns the decision.
Scene from Casa de Toast:
Tracy: (sharp intake of breath)
Toast: What?!
Tracy: Marie Osmond's son committed suicide!
Toast: Well, wouldn't you?
(...uncomfortable silence...)
Toast: OK, that was totally wrong.
Um, healthcare reform? Still very much kinda important. Pass the fucking bill.
Via Ron Chusid at Liberal Values, how Star Trek "should have" ended.
With the exception of the very, very end, which tweaked me a bit for reasons that will be obviously apparent to those who know how I feel about science fiction's other franchise, I found this both hilarious and actually somewhat plausible. I did think that the end of Trek, with the almost getting sucked into the vortex and the jettisoning of the warp core, was a bit much. This alternate approach would have led to some very interesting possibilities
Tags: blogging malaise, stupid IRS, Thomas Jones, inappropriate humor, healthcare reform, Star Trek
NoMaas' Sensei John Kreese interviews Yankees GM Brian Cashman. To appreciate the enormity of the NoMaas guys landing face time with C-Money... well, put it this way: It would be like me having Angus Young over to play Rock Band, or getting Tony Bourdain to come over and help cook for pasta night.
You probably saw it, but Litbrit penned a post yesterday on fear, anxiety, terrorism, self-control, accountability, demagoguery, and human nature that simply took my breath away. It also made me think of this Rush song.
This post by Benen on the "conspicuous unintelligence" of Congressional Republicans is quite forceful. Frankly, I think evolution is at work here. GOP Senators and Representatives have adapted to the intellectual level of their constituents by shedding unnecessary cognitive capacity.
I don't want to jinx anything, but it's looking like Obama is finally ready to push all his chips to the middle of the table on healthcare reform this week.
"Young. Conservative. Bombastic." And we're going to write a piece about him. Because that's just so fucking original. A bombastic winger asshole saying "outrageous" things at CPAC? Yeah, that needs exposure.
Tags: Brian Cashman, Lock And Key, stupid Republicans, Obama and healthcare reform, Slate pimps a new wingnut
"No one likes paying taxes obviously." -- Scott Brown (R - Thanks Massholes), empathizing with the deranged sociopath who flew a small plane into an IRS office yesterday.
And actually, Senator, you're dead wrong. Paying one's taxes without whining like a pissy little baby about it is what mature, responsible citizens do. Not that you or your supporters would know anything about that.
Tags: Scott Brown, Joe Stack
Via Andrew Sullivan, a probing analysis of Obama's defense of the stimulus bill from Rush Limbaugh:
"I know we're not supposed to talk about Adolf Hitler but this administration is making it really, really tough to ignore some facts out there. ... [T]he "Big Lie" was an expression coined by Hitler. And the "Big Lie" is exactly what all of liberalism is. ... This is how the OSS described Hitler's psychology: "His primary rules were: never allow the public to cool off; never admit a fault or a wrong; never concede that there may be some good in your enemy; never leave room for alternatives; never accept blame; concentrate on one enemy at a time and blame him for everything that goes wrong" -- hello, George W. Bush and the Republicans!"
Put aside, if you can, the fact that Limbaugh is invoking the Nazi propaganda machine as a parallel for the Obama administration's rational and rather low-key defense of what was, agree with it or not, a fairly benign and uncontroversial bit of economic policy. What's far more breathtaking and revolting is the projection and/or deliberate inversion of reality that is going on. The man takes a description of a particular type of demagogic strategy that applies in every last particular to the Bush-Cheney-Rove White House specifically and to the right-wing noise machine - of which he is one of the biggest pieces! - in general and he applies it to the Obama administration which - again, regardless of what you think of their policies - operates in a way that fits that description not at all.
Truly, it will be a joyous day when this fat, lying, pill-popping, motherfucking piece of shit shuffles off this mortal coil. On that day, I will dance a fucking jig.
Tags: Rush Limbaugh, projection, people whose passing will make me glad
Jonathan Chait, responding to Greg Mankiw's list of demands for GOP cooperation with Obama's deficit reduction commission, writes the following:
On a pure policy level, I'd be happy with a straightforward compromise that reduced the deficit with a half and half mixture of tax cuts and spending cuts, and made the tax code neither more nor less progressive.
With the usual caveat that I was not an economics major... What the fuck?
A "half and half" -- i.e. dollar for dollar -- package of tax cuts and spending cuts would, by the laws of arithmetic and the customs of accounting, have exactly zero net effect on the deficit. How Chait could get all the way through typing that sentence without slapping his forehead in recognition of his dunceitude is a mystery.
In any case, if Mankiw's list, which "demands that .. new taxes apply to consumption rather than income .. demands cuts in income taxes and corporate taxes, plus a total repeal of the estate tax" is indicative of the current mindset among Republicans, a healthy "Go Fuck Yourself" from the White House is in order. Although, wait, now that I think of it, there's an opportunity here: If Obama and the Democrats proposed eliminating the estate tax... might Republicans suddenly embrace it?
Tags: tax policy
Shower, pack, drop off the birds at the kennel, and then it's down to NYC for our annual* Valentine's Day pilgrimage. Our bridge awaits, as does our romantic little Italian restaurant, as does all the rest of the city we both adore. It should, as always, be a wonderful time.
To all you lovebirds out there, Happy Valentine's Day. Make the most of it.
(*OK, we skipped last year. Big mistake. Won't happen again.)
Tags: Valentine's Day
Woot! 2010 Winter Olympics in the hizzy, y'all! Let me hear ya say Brrrrrrr! ("Brrrrrr!")
Thank you.
The 2010 Winter Games get underway in Vancouver in just a little while, and I for one am psyched. No, Douchebag on ESPN Radio this afternoon, you were not speaking for "everyone" when you ran your mouth about They're not real sports, No one cares, blah blah blah. Fuck your humbuggery. Fuck it sideways with a speed-skate blade. Right here you've got one All-American sports fan who loves the Olympics, and loves the Winter Olympics especially. So you and any other haters can stow that shit for the next two weeks while I enjoy people hurtling at insane speeds down damn-near frictionless surfaces and gorgeous chicks in skimpy outfits delivering breath-takingly beautiful performances and, yes, guys warming what amounts to an icy shuffleboard track with brooms.
I shall enjoy every minute of it, thank you very much. Starting with the opening ceremonies and the parade of nations - always must-see tee vee for me - in just a little over an hour.
Let the Games begin!
Tags: Olympics
In his own low-key, understated way, Ben Nelson is often an even bigger douchebag than Joe Lieberman.
Is it me, or do 99% of technology articles take the form "Can [X] knock off [Y]?" And for the record, no, I doubt Google Buzz will make a dent in Facebook's popularity.
Matt Yglesias puts the Teaholes' "popularity" in perspective.
We've come a long way from "Thank you meester BOOOOOSH!" haven't we?
Personally, I'd ban the mushing of cake into one's newly-minted spouse's face. Although, if the weddings I've been to recently are indicative, that already seems to have faded in popularity.
Chait's final two sentences here perfectly summarize the method to Andrew Sullivan's particular madness.
Turns out that, in most cases, anti-depressants are no better than placebos. For some reason, I don't find this terribly surprising.
The American people want Congress to keep trying to pass comprehensive healthcare reform. And they largely blame the GOP for the current stalemate. Good.
Tags: Ben Nelson, lazy writing, Tea Baggers, Iraq, stupid wedding traditions, Andrew Sullivan, anti-depressants, healthcare reform
Benen, in a post titled "Understanding Bipartisanship":
As recently as 2006, when Republican policymakers controlled the levers of power, it was the duty of elected officials to stick to their principles and work on the agenda they presented to voters. In 2010, with Democrats controlling the levers of power, it is the duty of elected officials to compromise on their principles, scale the agenda they presented to voters, and govern in such a way as to make the rejected and discredited minority party happy.
Take health care policy, for example, the signature domestic policy effort of the Democratic Party. For about a year now, Dems have been making concessions and moving its reform plan closer to the middle. Medicare for all was considered, and taken off the table. Expanded Medicare eligibility was considered, and then taken off the table. A public option was considered, and then taken off the table. All the while, conservative Republicans were unwilling to make literally any concessions at all.
You kinda wish someone in the mainstream media would point out that the Republican party is a bunch of overgrown, spoiled children hell-bent on mindless obstruction and petty political gamesmanship. But that's not important, I guess. What's important is that liberals are so condescending.
Tags: Republicans suck
Friends! Readers! Countrymen! At long last, America's Highest of Holy Days has arrived. Gather ye upon thy over-stuffed furniture. Gaze with wonder upon mountain ranges of snackies and munchies and ill-conceived calorific goodness. Wade without care into mighty rivers of fermented beverages of all flavors and hues and percentages of alcohol by volume. And above all, fire up your flatscreens and prepare for football's furious finale... the Superbowl.
Too much?
Hey, what can I say, I'm excited for the Big Game, ya know?
This should be a good one. This could be one of the best ever. We've got two outstanding, pass-happy offenses led by one Great quarterback and one The Greatest quarterback. The over/under is set at a staggering 57 points, the highest in Superbowl history. I mean, are you kidding? This should be my kind of Superbowl.
If the Saints can hold up their end of the bargain, that is.
That's really the question that's on every football fan's mind right now. That's why, while most prognosticators are calling for a high-scoring affair and a modest Colts win, a healthy but vocal minority - I'm looking at you, Dungy - are predicting a Colts blowout. The latter unhappy scenario is possible if Indianapolis' hot-rod defense can get in Brees' grille and turn the Saints back into the Aints. That would be bad for all of us, wouldn't it? Bad for us, bad for football, and dare I say bad for America. Don't let it happen, Drew. Rise to the occasion.
I'm personally a little conflicted in terms of rooting interest. I want the Saints to win because they're a great team carrying the hopes of a long-suffering fan base and a city that's still recovering from a disaster of epic proportions. And, of course, I want it for our buddy 'Shift, a Saints Superfan and a dependable fixture on the Couch™ lo these many years. On the other hand, there's a part of me - the part that's nursing a serious man-crush on the Greatest Quarterback to Ever Play the Game - that wants the Colts to win, simply as a matter of cementing number eighteen's legacy. I gaze into my heart and see these impulses jostling uncomfortably against each other and I know not what to do. The only right and proper course of action, methinks, is to cultivate an attitude of Zen-like detachment, living each moment of the game without longing for an outcome.
Yeah, that's the ticket!
Kickoff is just a smidge over seven hours away. I've got two bird cages to clean before Fridge gets here, then we've got some Mario Brothers on tap and the Puppy Bowl on Animal Planet. And did I mention beer? Because, you know, beer.
Rejoice, peeps, and be glad you were born a 'Murkan.
Tags: NFL
Just dorking around with this Echo Navigator widget, seeing if I can get the recent comments tab to pop the comment window...
Well, that's ugly, but it does work. Wish they didn't show the link address like that...
OK, "work" was overstating things. The link pops the comments window, but doesn't take you to the actual comment. Ugh.
Tags: Echo
This morning on Morning Edition: A fawning profile of Seattle area Tea Party organizer Keli Carender, aka Liberty Belle.
This afternoon on All Things Considered: A fascinating and insightful interview with right-wing blogger Andrew Breitbart.
Of course, as we all know, NPR is the left-wing equivalent of FOX News. Totally one-sided.
Tags: NPR, liberal media
Beyonce, Black Eyed Peas, Taylor Swift, Lady Gaga, and my personal favorite, Kings of Leon. Those are the artists that dominated the nominations for the 2010 Grammy awards. Personally, I call that a down year for music, but your mileage may very well vary. Of course, the Grammys are about the performances and pageantry more than the awards anyhow, right? Right! So please join us on the Couch for a little Sunday night awards party. Let's give this weekend a good send-off.
Tags: Grammy awards
"Obama is a terrific speaker and a very smart guy. He really showed up the Republicans in the now-famous give-and-take. But we knew that. What's now in question isn't his ability to talk, it's his ability to lead." -- Paul Krugman
This is exactly right, and I had the same thought earlier this week, expressed in my LOLPresident below. Obama gave a pretty great SOTU address, and he sliced and diced the House GOP members like the Bride taking on the Crazy 88. He knows what he's talking about and he exudes confidence in any policy discussion. It really is a joy to behold after eight years of listening to Spanky the Wonder-Monkey make word salad. But it's not enough. At some point, when you're the president, you need to start telling people what to do.
Tags: Obama
Reading this, it occurred to me that I can't even remember what it's like to not follow politics obsessively. It actually strikes me as bizarre that most of my fellow citizens go about their lives with something approaching complete disregard for what's going on in Washington.
Tags: politics
Tags: Obama
And the Year of the Suck continues. In a stunningly boneheaded move, the Obama administration is planning to call for a three-year freeze on discretionary federal spending. If this sad attempt to mollify the unmollifiable by doing the one thing that government should never do during a recession (yes, we're still in one) strikes you as completely at odds with both sound policy and smart politics then pull up a chair, pardner; I'm buying the next round.
After months of screeching from the right that the stimulus failed, that government spending never helps the economy, and that, now that there's a Democrat in the White House (of course), we must ALL FREAK OUT ABOUT THE DEFICIT, Obama is... freezing spending and freaking out about the deficit. (Hey, Scott Brown is worried about the deficit, and he knows what he's talking about. We know this because he drives a truck.)
Chait depicts the move as typical 11-dimensional chess-playing* from an administration that wants to convince the bond markets they're serious about the deficit. Drum, on the other hand, reads it as a continuation of the group pants-shitting the Democrats are doing in the wake of the MA special election. I am strongly inclined towards Mr. Drum's interpretation.
All in all, this should make for a fun week. Liberals will no doubt go ape-shit over this, and quite justifiably so as, in addition to being bad policy, it looks like Obama is once again giving the "base" the "finger". The GOP and the Winger horde, despite having successfully provoked exactly the course of action they claimed to want, will somehow spin this as a horrible, outrageous, indefensible - nay, impeachable - offense before the last word of the announcement has left Obama's lips. Their contortions will at least provide some meager entertainment. About the only people who will be happy are the Very Serious types that infest the Sunday morning talk shows - aka the People Who Have Been Wrong About Everything Since Forever.
Good times all around. I need a drink.
*™ John Cole
Update: Krugman's reaction is about as harsh as you'd expect:
[I]t's a betrayal of everything Obama's supporters thought they were working for. Just like that, Obama has embraced and validated the Republican world-view -- and more specifically, he has embraced the policy ideas of the man he defeated in 2008.
Yup.
Tags: stupid economic tricks
It is Championship Weekend, and Fridge and I are reviving our old tradition of getting together at his place for the games. Tracy and I should be bound for the CT shore no later than 1:00 PM so we can get a little Mariokart in with the Fridgelets before banishing them to the basement come kickoff. (That's the theory, at least.) There will be wings and pizza and beer (oh my!) and, of course, there will be football; football like this Jets fan hasn't seen in over a decade.
I'm giving the Jets about a 1-in-4 shot to pull it off today. If that sounds pessimistic, it's not. A month ago I would have given the Jets a 1-in-40 shot to beat the Colts straight-up (i.e. in a game where Caldwell doesn't yank his starters like a craven loser). But I have succumbed, after two playoff games, to that deadliest of poisons, that virus that has done in Jets fans for generations: Hope.
This fan has begun to believe.
After they manhandled the Bengals I thought "Hey, nice win! That'll give them something positive to build on next year." But it was, after all, the Bengals.
After they beat the 14-2 Chargers out west, however, I started thinking "Wait, hold on a second, could these guys be for real?"
I knew our defense was good - statistically the best - but I didn't really know how good until I saw Darrelle Revis make a once-in-a-lifetime pick where he caught a ball bouncing off his receiver's shoe and had the presence of mind to know it was live, protect it, and get up and run with it. I knew our running game was a force, but I didn't know just how much of a force until I saw the rook, Shonn Greene, bolt through the Bolts like a turbo-charged semi for a 50+ yard TD score. And I knew Mark Sanchez would be a good QB someday, but I didn't know that day might be in January 2010 until I saw him bob and weave in the pocket, avoiding pass rushers, and then laser a ball to Dustin Keller in the end zone.
And this, again, was against the Chargers, who despite their miscues, most emphatically do not suck.
Indy is pretty much the same team as the Chargers. Maybe a little better, faster on defense, but the same anemic rushing, all-pass offense. Well, there is one other difference, and he wears number 18.
If the Colts had any other QB in the league, up to and including Tom Brady, Brett Favre, and Drew Brees, I'd put the Jets chances of victory at about even. But the Colts have the Smartest Quarterback to Ever Play the Game. They have Peyton Fucking Manning, my favorite non-Jet football player. Rex Ryan has solved plenty of puzzles with his innovative defensive schemes over the years. He's right up there with Belichick in terms of defensive genius. Maybe better. But ol' Rex hasn't solved the puzzle that is Peyton. He's 1-6 against Manning, not counting Caldwell's Cowardly Cave. Maybe this is the week he unlocks the secret that dims Manning's brilliance. Or maybe this is the week that big green stage coach turns back into a pumpkin.
I'll close with this: You know that old saying, "Karma is a Bitch"? If the Jets, who wouldn't be in the playoffs at all without the lay-down the Colts pulled in week 16, do manage to bump off the Colts, it would be a just and righteous victory; a fitting repudiation of Caldwell's folly and a sharp reminder of that Eternal Truth spoken by the Prophet Herman:
You PLAY. To WIN. The GAME.
Tags: NFL
If you're upset by the lack of influence and access that corporate America has in Washington, here's a little sweet relief for you:
WASHINGTON (AP) -- The Supreme Court threw out a 63-year-old law designed to restrain the influence of big business and unions on elections Thursday, ruling that corporations may spend as freely as they like to support or oppose candidates for president and Congress. The decision could drastically alter who gives and gets hundreds of millions of dollars in this year's crucial midterm elections.
2010 is really shaping up to be a banner year, isn't it?
Tags: corporate campaign contributions, Supreme Court
Less than 48 hours after the idea surfaced, liberal House Dems are saying they'll put the kibosh on the "pass the Senate bill" shortcut. Unless Pelosi pulls off some kind of stunning end run around them - and I don't see how it's mathematically possible - that means HCR is pretty much finished. It'll probably be a decade before we get another serious run at it. (I won't say "a generation" because the status quo will blow the rest of the economy out of the water well before that.)
The political cost of this failure will include substantial losses for the Democrats this November and a real chance that Obama is consigned to one-termer status. The human cost will be tens of millions of Americans continuing to soldier on without health coverage, countless bankruptcies, and a not inconsiderable number of needless deaths. What a sad, sad mess.
Update: As if it's not bad enough that, facing 4th and goal with inches to go for the go-ahead score, our offensive unit has started wandering off the field, here comes coach calling for the punting team.
Sometimes I wish I didn't have a heart and a brain. Then I could be a conservative and I'd actually have a political party to represent my interests and preferences.
Tags: healthcare reform
I don't have the time or energy to write a long, thoughtful post about the MA special election aftermath - Heh, really, when was the last time I wrote a long, thoughtful post about anything besides football? - so I'll just hit the low points:
Holy shit was Coakley a terrible candidate. She blew off old-school, door-to-door campaigning, committed a series of boneheaded gaffes, ran a lackadaisical campaign, and capped it off by taking a vacation with three weeks to go. Basically, she acted like Teddy's anointed successor, assuming the seat was hers by the acclaim of the state Democratic party. Just horrible.
Holy shit are Massachusetts voters a bunch of stupid, superficial airheads. They fell for a guy whose platform can be summed up as "Duhhhhh, I drive a truck. Taxes are bad." In other words, Massachusetts -- friggin' Massachusetts -- just elected a younger and possibly dumber Fred Thompson.
Furious is spot-on with this prediction:
Blue Dog and conservative Democrats shit their pants and run for the fucking hills on EVERYTHING. Funny how that works: A Republican loses? Then they weren't conservative enough, the party hunkers down and moves to the right. A Democrat loses? They weren't conservative enough, the Democrats abandon everything and run to the right like a goddamn bear is chasing them.
They own the narrative, people. This is the same country where Newsweek, in the same month as Obama's landslide victory, ran a cover story titled "America the Conservative". They own the fucking narrative. I'm starting to wonder if that will change in my lifetime.
Healthcare reform need not die. The way to passage is clear and well-marked. The House just needs to pass the Senate bill and put it on Obama's desk. They can tinker with funding via reconciliation. I'm not confident this will happen by any stretch, just pointing out that Brown's victory need not be the final turd in the HCR punchbowl.
I don't buy the "59 > 60" meme that Howard Dean started spreading last night and that several bloggers have picked up and started running with. I understand the theory that our "60" was always too fragile and more trouble to maintain than it was worth, but I am unpersuaded that giving the Republicans the 41st vote that will allow them to effectively shut down the Senate will somehow spur Dems to get all medieval. If we've learned anything over the last ten years, it's that no provocation is sufficient to get the Democrats to find their inner Bad Asses.
The Tea-Baggers have the momentum in 2010. Their anger is vague and misplaced; their "ideas" are vapid, warmed-over, Reaganite gruel; they run the gamut from ignorant and misguided to downright evil. All that is true. But they have energy and political will - the two things that progressives have spent the last couple of months squandering as the idiot purists retreated to their ivory towers to shit all over HCR (and each other). This bodes ill for November.
That's all I got.
Tags: Coakley, Democrats, election
If I have to watch one more news report, listen to one more story, or read one more article or blog post about Umar Farouk Abdulmutallab I'm going to slit my fucking wrists. And then the terrorists will truly have won.
Tags: terrorism
By special request from the World's Greatest Wife...
Tags: entertainment
NFL playoff action kicks off with the first game of the divisional round in just about half an hour, and we are stoked here in the Shire. Chores are done, errands have been run, ample food and drink supplies have been laid in. To top it off, we've both got Monday off, so we can really go all out for two full days of pigskin paradise. Let's take a look at the games.
Cardinals @ Saints: The over/under on this game is 57 points, the highest such figure for a playoff game in twenty years, according to ESPN Radio. Drew Brees probably had to seek immediate medical help to avoid long-term injury after watching the Cardinals defense give up over 400 yards of passing to Aaron Rodgers last week. A lot of people are wondering whether the Saints can recover from their end-of-season malaise and get back to the world-beating form they showed through 13-0. I think at the very least you gotta believe that their offense can get back on track and get it done against this Cards D. The question then becomes can their defense hold Warner and company in check? I'll say yes, but just barely. Prediction: Saints 41 - Cardinals 35.
Ravens @ Colts: I'm a little torn about this game. Normally I'd be rooting full-bore for Peyton and the Colts, but if the Ravens can score the upset that would set up a potential home game for the Jets should Gang Green win tomorrow and move on to the conference championship. And a Ravens win is a real possibility. Baltimore smacked the shit out the Patriots last week, a team not dissimilar in makeup to Indianapolis. Further, the Colts are still under a bit of a black cloud after the team's decision to sell out on 19-0, and there are legitimate questions around how the team and their fans will respond tonight. So, do I see Baltimore rolling? Um, no. Prediction: Colts 31 - Ravens 20.
Cowboys @ Vikings: The Cowboys are without a doubt the hottest team out there right now, having won four straight to the tune of 99-31, including back-to-back ass whuppings of their hated division rival, Philadelphia. Questions about their late-season mojo seem like they were put to rest a lifetime ago. They proved they could win in December, then they proved they could win in January. Standing in their way is the Funslinger, ol' Love of the Game himself, the QB I Love to Hate, Brett Frackin' Favre. Brett and the Vikings were last seen scrimmaging against a lifeless Giants team in a game where they put 44 points on the board. Before that, however, it sure did look like the wheels were coming off the Brett-mobile, as the QB publicly squabbled with his coach and the team lost two straight. I think - and by "think" I mean "hope" - that's the Favre we get this weekend. Prediction: Cowboys 35 - Vikings 31.
Jets @ Chargers: The Chargers haven't lost a game since October. The Jets are only here because another team forfeited a game to them. The Chargers have one of the game's most potent offenses. The Jets have the league's best defense. The Jets have a rookie quarterback and a rookie coach. The Chargers have a red-hot QB just entering his prime and a veteran head coach (albeit one with a career losing record). OK, look, the Jets are a seven-point underdog, and that feels about right. But can they win? Sure. Control time of possession, pound the ball all day with the running game against a suspect Chargers run D, no mistakes from Sanchez, and don't give up the long ball to Rivers. That's all they have to do shock the world. I think they can do it. Huge Homer Prediction: Jets 24 - Chargers 21.
All right, let's rock this digital sofa, people! Enjoy the games!
Tags: NFL
I realize that using a disaster to score political points is tacky, but when I heard a Haitian structural engineer on NPR this morning attributing much of the destruction to the fact that "people are allowed to build whatever they want" I couldn't help but think that Haiti might have been better off with a meddling socialist/fascist/totalitarian government that does outrageously oppressive things like, you know, enforce building codes.
Tags: government
"PLAYoffs?! You kidding me? Playoffs?"
No, coach, I'm not kidding you. It's NFL Playoff time, baby! The most unpredictable and exciting post-season in pro sports kicks off half an hour from now as the first of four wildcard games gets underway in Cincinnati. Grab your favorite beverage and a snack or three and let's get ready for some football right here on the Virtual Couch™.
My J-E-T-S, as everyone in the football-watching world has probably been told by now, are the most improbable of contestants in this year's twelve-team field. Were it not for Jim Caldwell's highly questionable decision to pull his starters halfway through the Colts week 16 matchup with the Jets, my guys are probably sitting in their mansions watching today's games the same way I am, on television. Follow that up with a game against the Bengals where Cincy looked suspiciously like a team that was throttling it back to half speed, and yeah, it's fair to say the Jets "backed into" the playoffs. Hell, if I had been the last Jets player to score a TD last week, I'd have stopped at the one yard line, turned around, and backed my ass into the end zone in celebration of the Football Fates' fickle ways. But you know what they say (because they say it in every interview): It is what it is. The Jets are in, and just like everyone else they're four wins away from glory.
(Yeah, yeah, I know. Let me dream, if only for a few more hours.)
Let's make some predictions:
Jets @ Bengals: The Jets boast the league's top-ranked defense and top-ranked rushing attack. I don't see Cedric Benson running wild against our guys, and with Ochocinco marooned on Revis Island there just aren't a lot of ways for the Bengals to put up points. Except one: Turnovers, courtesy of Mark Sanchez. The rook is under a lot of pressure not to fuck up in his first post-season game, but Ryan has been ultra-conservative with Sanchez lately, and the results have been good: No picks in his last two games. If he keeps that up, I smell victory. Prediction: Jets 17 - Bengals 10.
Eagles @ Cowboys: Last week told you everything you need to know about the Eagles. Playing with a chance to notch a first-round bye, the Eagles laid down in Dallas and let the Cowboys walk all over them. Sure, Philadelphia is 11-5. All but one of those losses came to playoff teams, however, and a whole bunch of those wins were against the dregs of the league. Meanwhile, Romo and the 'Boys got the late-season monkey off their back and are white hot, coming off three straight wins and back-to-back shutouts. What do you think is going to happen here? Prediction: Cowboys 35 - Eagles 20.
Ravens @ Patriots: No Welker? No problem. No team this decade has proven more resilient in terms of overcoming injuries to key players than the Patriots. When Brady blew out his knee in the first game of 2008, the Pats rode a QB who never took a snap in college to double-digit wins, just barely missing the postseason. They are a system team, plain and simple, and as long as Belichick is on the sidelines running that system they are formidable. The Ravens? Meh. The only good team they've beaten all year was the Chargers, and that was way back in week 2. Something tells me they're not winning in Foxboro in January. Prediction: Patriots 31 - Ravens 21.
Packers @ Arizona: The Packers have won seven of their last eight, including a pounding of the Cardinals team they face today in their regular-season finale (granted, Arizona was resting their starters for most of the game). I know less about these two teams than any of the previous six, but here are three things that stand out: 1. Boldin is injured and either won't play or will be hobbled. 2. Fitzgerald gets Charles Woodson on him, a guy who's damn-near Darrelle Revis good. 3. Kurt Warner is 5,000 years old. Gonna be a long, ugly day in Phoenix. Prediction: Packers 28 - Cardinals 10.
OK, then. Let's watch some FOOTBALL!
Tags: NFL
Peter King (R - New York?!) lurves him some terrorists. As long as they're, like, white and freckly.
So the Colts let Vinatieri kick for the one week where it could fuck me in two fantasy playoffs and now they're going back to Stover. FMFFL.
Oh heeeallll no. Please, please, please make this bland bowl of centrist gruel go away for good.
If you're interested, Hartford's own Colin McEnroe interviewed Blumenthal today on his new afternoon show on WNPR.
Rex taunts Belichick. Rex boasts. Rex cries. Rex laments being eliminated from the playoffs. Rex celebrates making the playoffs. Rex claims the Jets are the team to beat in the playoffs. Well, say this much: He's certainly a change of pace from Eric Mangini.
If you'd told me people were furiously Googling "Hogchoker" I would have guessed it meant something entirely different.
Hey, don't laugh. I had a dishonest engine once, in my '88 Celica. Spent two grand trying to fix that POS.
And, lastly, the latest episode of What John Cole Said.
Tags: Peter King, fantasy football, Harold Ford, Richard Blumenthal, Rex Ryan, Hogchoker, honest engines, Progressive Obama Derangement Syndrome
Nick Baumann, filling in for Kevin Drum at MoJo, has a nice post up that gives non-Nutmeggers the low-down on just who this Richard Blumenthal guy is and why Dems are giddy at his chances to slide into Chris Dodd's seat next year:
[Blumenthal]'s visible -- he's always in the news, taking on "bad guys" and suing corporate villains. And he has a job in which it's really easy to be on the side of "the people." I grew up in Connecticut. When people had a problem with a company, they seemed just as likely to go straight to the AG's office as they were to call the Better Business Bureau or their state representative. And when you complain to the AG's office about a problem and they end up doing something about it, you remember it. Blumenthal has two decades worth of individuals who his office helped, and two decades worth of suing companies like Countrywide that were the focus of populist rage. Those companies hate him for it, of course, but ordinary people tend to like him -- a lot.
Yep. True story: Back in the mid nineties, when my ex and I were living in Western Connecticut, we suddenly started getting bills from Qwest Telecommunications for long distance service. Nonplussed, as we were quite happy with AT&T at the time, we ended up spending hours on the phone with the folks at Qwest, who insisted that their representative had contacted us and we had consented to switching our service. That call - like hundreds of others that had supposedly been made across the state, all to households with Hispanic-sounding last names - had never happened, but Qwest doggedly refused to switch us back at no charge and zero out our bill. Until, that is, good ol' Dick Blumenthal got on the case. Shortly after hearing that our fearless AG was wise to their underhanded practices and was going after them for "slamming", we called Qwest back and mentioned the impending lawsuit to the rep we got on the line. Wouldn't you know, within minutes a credit was issued to our account and a service order to revert us to AT&T was in the works.
So yeah, that Blumenthal fella? He's OK in my book.
Tags: Richard Blumenthal
"He was charged with no crime, and broke no law. He always argued that he had done nothing wrong. But the job that he adored was gone." -- CT Senator Chris Dodd, describing the plight his father, former CT Senator Thomas J. Dodd, faced at the end of his career.
I suppose I should be grateful that Dodd is stepping down now, thereby turning almost-certain defeat in November into almost-certain victory for his would-be successor, Attorney General Richard Blumenthal, a fairly reliable liberal and a staunch consumer advocate. And I am, actually, grateful. But I'm also pissed off that it came to this; that the same Connecticut electorate that returned a lying, unprincipled turncoat to office in 2006 was poised to dump an accomplished, respected Senator whose efforts over the years have virtually all been to the benefit of our state and our country; all over a stupid nontroversy that critics blew completely out of proportion. It's frankly disgusting.
Tags: Chris Dodd, stupid Connecticut voters
Holy crap! Having smart, older, white parents causes autism!
One of the dumbest instances of "Security Theater" I've ever heard of.
Another reason to love Avatar.
Kona's right, this ad for Taco Bell's Drive-Thru diet is ridiculous.
Tags: autism, homeland security, conservative idiots, Avatar, really bad weight-loss ideas
We have reached the final week of the 2009-10 NFL regular season and, in the AFC at least, the wildcard race remains very much up in the air, with a whopping seven teams fighting over two spots in the post-season. Among those teams are my beloved-yet-ever-exasperating Jets, who, as the NFL talking heads like to say, "control their own destiny". A win against the Bengals at home tonight and Gang Green - recipients of a dubious Christmas gift in Indianapolis last Sunday - will see their season continue next week, either with a rematch against Cincinnati (please) or a trip to snowy Foxboro (please, no). A loss tonight would end their season regardless of what transpires in the early games.
There's a tiny voice in my head asking "Wouldn't you rather just get the inevitable disappointment over with now, so you can move on with your life?"
Alas, no, that is not a path I can embrace, for I am a Jets fan, and blind, stupid, futile hope is my birthright, gods-dammit.
There's been some question as to whether Cincy will bother to play their starters for all or part of the game, particularly if the Patriots win earlier in the day, locking the Bengals into the #4 spot. If Chad Ochocinco has his way Cincinnati will bring their "A" game. The league's most self-overrated receiver has been Tweeting up a storm all week, talking shit about how he's going to school Darrelle Revis. I hope that matchup does go down, just so Ochocinco can feel the sadness and isolation of being trapped on an island with Veintecuatro.
On to the week's games, where it appears we're getting the rare double-double-header:
CBS: Patriots @ Texans (1:00 PM) and Ravens @ Raiders (4:00 PM)
FOX: Giants @ Favres (1:00 PM) and Eagles @ Cowboys (4:00 PM)
Sunday Night Football will wrap up the season with the aforementioned Jets of the Greater Metropolitan New York City Area versus the Bengals of Cincinnati. Monday Night Football will not be seen this week so that we may bring you a special episode of House Hunters: Cleveland with Mike Holmgren.
Hope you all cherish the last dying embers of the holiday season as we prepare to return to work tomorrow. And, as always, enjoy the games.
Oh, and one last thing...
GO CUTIES!!!
Tags: NFL
A year and a decade have come to an end. If that ain't meme time, I don't know what is. I'm dusting off the same meme I've used for the past few years, but I'm going to add a twist: I'll answer each question for both 2009 specifically and also for the aughts where appropriate. And I may add, subtract or tweak a question or two. Enjoy.
1a. What did you do in 2009 that you'd never done before?
Went to Italy. Amazing place. Still pining for it.
1b. What did you do in the aughts that you'd never done before?
Bought a house. Traveled abroad. Fell really, truly, deeply in love.
2. Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
I did not. But I have some for this year, and FSM-dammit I am keeping these:
Run 200 miles
Bike 1000 miles
Get below 200 pounds
3a. Did anyone close to you give birth in 2009?
My cousin Kim had her second baby, Leah.
3b. Did anyone close to you give birth in the aughts?
Jesus, are you kidding? My cousins were a veritable baby assembly line. Kim and her husband Neil had Caileigh and Leah. Kara and J-Dobb had Ryan and Bree. Kristin and Tom had Maeve and Ashlyn. Tommy has his boy Eric now, and Kenny and his wife Tracy had Jack, Liam and Michaela.
4a. Did anyone close to you die in 2009?
My Nana. She lived well into her nineties, but last year she just gave out. She is missed.
4. Did anyone close to you die in the aughts?
My niece, Laura. She was a year older than me. Died of Lupus and related complications. It's still somewhat surreal that she's gone.
5a. What places did you visit in 2009?
Italy. Specifically, Florence, Venice, Assisi, and Rome. We planned that trip for years, and it came and went in a flash. Four months later I still can't believe it's done and finished. I'd go back in a stone-cold heartbeat.
5. What places did you visit in the aughts?
Italy. Ireland, which was equally amazing. Jamaica, for our honeymoon. The Bahamas, for our free Sandals vacation. Key West, my spiritual homeland, twice. Tampa Bay for Yankees spring training. Gorgeous Savannah. The Outer Banks. Las Vegas, twice, the second time for my epic 40th birthday party. Page, Arizona, where my sibs Mike and Kathy live. Baltimore. And, of course, The Greatest City on Earth, more times than I can count.
6. What would you like to have in the next decade that you lacked in 2009?
Better health. I know "fat and happy" is supposed to be a good thing, but after a certain point fat starts to detract from happy. So many things would be better if I could manage my weight better. Also, I'd like to figure out an end-game for my career. I'm plugging along right now, making decent money, but I'm kind of in a rut. I need to figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life in terms of work.
7a. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 20th, the day the worst president in history left the stage and a better, far more sane man took over. August 29th, when we flew to Italy for a trip that touched me like few experiences have.
7b. What dates from the aughts will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
December 12th, 2000: When a right-wing Supreme Court stole a presidential election, sending us down a path more terrible than the worst cynics ever imagined.
September 11th, 2001.
February 1st, 2003: My first date with Tracy. A snowy drive to a Chinese restaurant in East Longmeadow. First kiss. A night that lasted until the sun came up.
July 21st, 2003: Emancipation day. My divorce from my ex-wife is final.
September 4th, 2004: Tracy and I get married. The single greatest day of my life, without question.
June 17th, 2005: The day we officially became home owners.
December 26th, 2007: The day we brought my beautiful Birdstone home. Oh crap, don't cry, don't cry...
8a. What was your biggest achievement(s) of 2009?
I ran a 5K. It doesn't sound like much, I know, but you have no idea how hard it was to get there. I pushed through knee pain that was damn near disabling, kept at it, and broke through to the other side. I can run now. Or, well, jog, at least...
8b. What was your biggest achievement(s) of the aughts?
Forging a perfect marriage with the true love of my life. It was a long road to get here, and it took a lot of pain and hard-learned lessons, but it was more than worth it. I am complete now.
9a. What was your biggest failure of 2009?
Let my weight get out of control.
9b. What was your biggest failure of the aughts?
Let my career stall.
10a. Did you suffer illness or injury in 2009?
Just severe knee pain from jogging.
10b. Did you suffer illness or injury in the aughts?
Had my appendix out in 2003. Shattered my right big toe doing karate. Was diagnosed with Barrett's Esophagus.
11. What was the best thing you bought in 2009?
Abbie and Monet, our second pair of 'keets. They completed the flock.
11. What was the best thing you bought in the aughts?
Wow, I really can't pick a single "best"...
Tracy's engagement ring.
Our lovely, cozy house in the Shire.
My first parakeet, Ms. Birdstone.
Our Prius. Gods, what an outstanding car.
My Droid.
12a. Whose behavior merited celebration in 2009?
Mariano, Derek, Andy and Jorge.
12b. Whose behavior merited celebration in the aughts?
Al Gore. Obama. Sully Sullenberger. Lance Armstrong.
13a. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed in 2009?
The American right wing. For eight years their team ran the show, and they fucked up everything. Absolutely everything. So what do they do in 2009 when it's all over and we're in charge again? Do they back off, admit they were wrong, quiet down and take an introspective time-out? No, they triple-down on the Crazy. Fucking asshats.
13b. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed in the aughts?
Sandra Day O'Connor and Anthony Kennedy. Rehnquist, Scalia and Thomas are (were) unprincipled scumbags, but these two should have known better. I hope they take the guilt of that vote to the grave.
Osama bin Laden.
Dick Cheney. Arguably the most evil American politician of all time.
George W. Bush. Inarguably the dumbest American president of all time.
John McCain. I remember thinking that he was a decent guy for a Republican. Man, was I wrong.
Sarah Palin. Makes me want to vomit.
CoulterHannityLimbaughBeckHewittKrauthammerWeiner and every other right-wing liar out there making a buck by tearing the country apart.
The Republican party. Damn them all to hell.
John Yoo. Alberto Gonzalez. Donald Rumsfeld. Jesus, this list is endless.
Joe Fucking Lieberman. The Biggest Tool in the Universe.
Everyone who contributed to turning the Blog That Shall Not Be Named from a fantastic, fascinating community into a fascist cesspool.
Jane Hamsher. When you start making joint statements with Grover Norquist, you have lost your fucking way as a progressive.
14a. Where did most of your money go in 2009?
Interest on our two mortgages.
14b. Where did most of your money go in the aughts?
Interest on our two mortgages.
15a. What did you get really, really, really excited about in 2009?
The Yankees. What a season. What a team. I can't believe how head over heels in love I am with baseball. I miss it.
15b. What did you get really, really, really excited about in the aughts?
Marrying Tracy. Every day - every damned day - I look at that beautiful face and realize in a new way just how lucky I am.
16a. What song will always remind you of 2009?
16b. What song will always remind you of the aughts?
17a. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) Happier or sadder?
About the same. And that's pretty damned good.
b) thinner or fatter?
Ten pounds fatter. Time to unleash hell on the gut.
c) richer or poorer?
About the same.
17b. Compared to this time ten years ago, are you:
a) Happier or sadder?
Way, way, way happier.
b) thinner or fatter?
Actually? About the same. I was a tub of lard at 31, got really fit for a while, and now I'm a tub of lard again.
c) richer or poorer?
Richer. My salary is up 30% after 10 years, so not bad. 401-K keeps building. We bought a house. All in all, not bad. We should save more, but we don't.
18a. What do you wish you'd done more of in 2009?
Developed myself professionally. I'm stuck in a grind at work, and I feel like I haven't learned anything new in ages.
18b. What do you wish you'd done more of in the aughts?
Cycling. It's my favorite outdoor activity, and one of these years I really want to lock in and get serious about it.
19a. What do you wish you'd done less of in 2009?
Fuck around on Facebook.
19b. What do you wish you'd done less of in the aughts?
Argue with people. I've probably written over a million words and spent countless hours arguing with friends and foes, and I don't think I've changed a single mind about anything. And it's not because I'm bad at arguing, it's because I misunderstood the nature of arguing. It's not fighting; it's sparring. In a fight, someone eventually wins. In a sparring match, both people just hone their skills more.
20. How did you spend Christmas this year?
X-Mas dinner at our house. Tracy's family came for dinner. My mom came down for a couple of days. It was fun. (Same answer as last year and the year before...)
21. Did you fall in love in the aughts?
Truly, madly, deeply. And I remain so to this day. It is no rhetorical flourish when I say that I had no idea this kind of love was possible.
22a. How was work in 2009?
Crazy. I worked harder this Summer than I have ever worked in my life. No joke. And the sad thing is that it might all come to naught.
22b. How was work in the aughts?
Successful in terms of my remuneration. Less successful in terms of my happiness and career development.
23a. What was your favorite TV program in 2009?
Survivor. A decade after it got started, this is still the most entertaining and compelling "reality" show on television. And I'm a little gay for Jeff Probst.
23b. What was your favorite TV program in the aughts?
Supernatural. You probably expected me to say Battlestar Galactica, didn't you? But no. BSG was a glorious but deeply flawed series. Supernatural is consistently brilliant.
24. What did you do for your birthday in 2009?
Went to Leon's Italian restaurant in New Haven. It was good, but it wasn't Italy. We're beginning to figure out that nothing here is.
25a. What was the best book you read in 2009?
Anathem by Neal Stephenson.
25b. What was the best book you read in the aughts?
Snow Crash by Neal Stephenson.
26a. What was your greatest musical discovery of 2009?
Kate Miller-Heidke. She opened for Ben Folds in Northampton and she was amazing. Very creative, incredible voice. Her songs are what I'd call "smart pop".
26b. What was your greatest musical discovery of the aughts?
It's impossible to single out one band or artist, so I'll single out a genre: Classical guitar. It never would have occurred to me that I'd even like the stuff, so it certainly took me by surprise that I fell in love with it.
27a. What did you want and get in 2009?
An absolutely incredible trip to Italy.
27b. What did you want and get in the aughts?
A new marriage.
28a. What did you want and not get in 2009?
A new driveway.
28b. What did you want and not get in the aughts?
A fulfilling career.
29a. What was your favorite film of 2009?
Star Trek. Yes, the plot was sketchy, but gods what a gorgeous movie. I really hope it's the start of a great run.
29b. What was your favorite film of the aughts?
Iron Man. I saw a lot of great movies over the last ten years, but this one stands out. It was just perfect.
30a. Did you make some new friends in 2009?
I met some fun Facebook people through my Mafia Wars friending.
30b. Did you make some new friends in the aughts?
Yes, and it was all thanks to the internet. Anyone who tells you that you can't forge "real" friendships online needs to talk to me about Furious, Mike, the Howards, 'Shift, Kona, Chemist, Tart, Litbrit, Maurinsky, Oddjob, and all the others who are near and dear to my heart thanks to the magic of the tubes.
31a. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
A war crimes tribunal for Bush and Cheney.
31b. What one thing would have made your decade immeasurably more satisfying?
President Al Gore.
32a. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
I discovered Earth tones. I look so much better in Earth tones than I do in primary colors. Who knew?
32b. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in the aughts?
Large and loose.
33a. What kept you sane in 2009?
My birds. They're just four ounces of feathers and fweeps, but they've become the heart of our home.
33b. What kept you sane in the aughts?
My wife. She is the finest human being I've ever met. Every day she single-handedly restores my faith in our species.
34a. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most in 2009?
Cheryl Burke. On paper, she's not my type at all, but there's just something about her that rings my bell.
34b. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most in the aughts?
Gwyneth Paltrow. The Goddess who Walks the Earth.
35a-1. What political issue stirred you the most in 2009?
The decision by the doctrinaire Left to try to sabotage healthcare reform. I never realized, when Bush was in office, that so many of my liberal fellow travelers were such unreasonable, hard-core ideologues. It took a Democratic president to bring that sad fact to light.
35a-2. What political issue stirred you the least in 2009?
The Wall Street Bailout. Hey, look at that, it wasn't the apocalypse after all. I was right and you were wrong, Panic Heads.
35b-1. What political issue stirred you the most in the aughts?
So, so, so many candidates, but I'll go with the illegal and immoral invasion of Iraq under false pretenses. If that wasn't worthy of impeachment then nothing is.
35b-2. What political issue stirred you the least in the aughts?
The War on Christmas?
36. Who did you miss in 2009?
Mike Wolf. You ever have one of those friends who you don't see all that often but just knowing they're out there makes you smile? Mike was like that. He's not out there anymore, and it makes me sad.
37a. Who was the best new person you met in 2009?
I don't think I met anyone new in 2009. If I met you in 2009 and you're not coming to mind now, my apologies.
37b. Who was the best new person you met in the aughts?
Tie: All my online friends.
38a. Burn any bridges in 2009?
I defriended a frat brother who took it upon himself to lecture me - 40-year-old me - about my language and lack of manners. I'm too old for that shit. If you still can't deal with who I am, go fuck yourself.
38b. Burn any bridges in the aughts?
One big one that leads to Rockland, Maine.
39a. Best new restaurant you went to in 2009?
Olio & Convivium in Florence, Italy. Possibly the best dining experience I've ever had.
39b. Best new restaurant you went to in the aughts?
Well, since I already answered O&C above, I'll go with Teodora in New York City. We missed you guys last Valentine's Day, but we will be back this year, I assure you.
40. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in the aughts.
Love is important. It doesn't matter what else you've got going on - how much you earn, how great (or not) your job is, what toys you've got - if you're not in love you're not whole. Find the person you were meant to be in love with and make them yours.
And that, my friends, is all she wrote. A new decade awaits. Onward.
P.S.: If you're reading this, you're tagged.
Tags: memes